last love letter of the year ~ reflections on 312 playlists
Solstice blessings!
This dispatch on 312 playlists comes from over a year of listening, with some of the lessons I learned along the way.
I am generally not into streaming music services, despite the fact that my old band is on most of them.
I made a giant exception starting in October 2021. A friend had died unexpectedly, and because I'm not into streaming, I never knew she had hundreds of Spotify playlists: for studying, for yoga classes, for fun, for her children. We'd met through music, so it seemed appropriate to dive into them. Her tastes, like mine, are eclectic. I figured I'd hear familiar music, new (to me) music, plus songs I liked and disliked and both categories.
When I saw that she'd made 312 of them, I was a bit daunted. In that moment, the universe told me, "It'll take over a year to listen to them." I knew that listening to all of them would require a certain level of commitment.
So, I committed to listening to all 312, for however long that took. I added the playlists into part of my usual ritual and spirit work, so as not to lose momentum, in case I had a spell of music I didn't like that much.
It's been one of the times I've been right about everything. New to me music, familiar music, with music I like and dislike in both categories. I've expanded my own listening, and I've gotten to know her better.
At the start of this year, when I'd made a small dent in the total playlist count, the universe told me I'd be done by the end of the year.
Let me tell you, if I'd caved to a paid Spotify account, I'd've been done a LOT sooner.
(And boy howdy, do I have some THOUGHTS about advertising after all this time. Outside the scope of this missive.)
But that would have changed so much magical timing, such as:
~ Hearing the "Forever December" playlist in December.
~ Just after my birthday this year, on an already poignant date, I heard my music on her playlists for the first time. Spotify tells me she added the song before we'd officially met. Since then, I've encountered my old band on other playlists.
~ Encountering "Your Top Songs of 2022" (an automatically generated playlist based on your listening (and admittedly a cool feature)), and, because I haven't listened to anything else on this platform all year, it reflected her choices.
Which made me realize that, in a way, she "made" it for me. Two of the tracks on this playlist have my voice on them.
~ She was Jewish, so it's lovely to finish the listening during Hanukkah, as well as the solstice portal, which is a meaningful time for me.
I think we never truly understand our potential impact on people. At best, we have a clear idea. But it's been a tremendous gift to learn more, after her death, of our effects on each other.
It's also been really special because universe constantly communicates to me through music. And now, I have communication with her. Like many loved ones who have already departed the physical plane, she's become another guide to me, as I navigate this plane.
I share this because listening to random playlists—of pop, of ambient sounds, of chanting, of Star Trek or Game of Thrones tracks, and so many other things—might not strike you as intuitive practice. I promise you, though, this is some of the deepest work I've done all year, the source of some of my most profound experiences since October 2021.
At crucible moments, it's natural to search, sometimes frantically, for ways to process or make things make sense. But something I believe very strongly, that I emphasize in classes and in The Spiral, is to do the obvious things. Explore new experiences, but don't get so caught up that you bypass what's most accessible and most directly connected to you.
Last night was the last gathering of The Spiral. Plans for 2023 are still tbd, but if you're interested, I'd love to know any ideas or suggestions you have.
In the meantime, don't forget to tune into YOU. Dedicate exploration of your immediate context, and find out what magic emerges from it.
Into the sacred deep,
S.
—
Siderealchemy
she / they
Super affirming and encouraging (sincerely) card pull on solstice eve, from The Luminous Void Tarot.
This block is a reminder that Siderealchemy has music channels on the site, Soundcloud, and Youtube. Enjoy!
Also, remember Dive Into Your Deck and Light Your Lantern? They're 2 intuition-altering classes about tarot and oracle practice. And available anytime for self-study. Learn more on the site.